Wednesday, September 05, 2007

5th Sept 07

This is Week 7 of school... next week is the last week of school before 2 weeks of holidays. Mid-sem break.

I'm getting tired of studying... studying day n night... worrying about not making the desired grades... worry about not meeting my expectations.. worry about letting my dad down...

Day in day out what's on my mind is to keep catching up with school work, lectures, notes, tutorials, presentations etc etc... I seem to have no life... I've ditched my personal life away in pursuit of grades... ditched hobbies, ditch whatever i like to do. I seemed to be even pushing the ppl around me away... always with the excuse of 'I need to study'

Honestly, I didn't expect my life to turn out to be like this. I feel so overwhelmed by everything. Especially school work. Really 没完没了. I feel I'm not in control anymore.

I just spent the last weekend nursing a sore throat and fever. Until now, I'm still coughing away. I spent the following weekend that just passed cleaning up the fucking house for inspection.

3 FUCKING DAYS OF CLEANING THE DAMN HOUSE. Every semester, every year.

I miss home. I miss my friends and family back in Singapore. Is it a form of escapism for me?

Am I giving myself too much pressure to excel?

Or is my time management sucky? I guess so for this...

This has got to be a low point for me...

The opportunity cost of studying overseas is so much more than I've expected...

I wonder had I stayed on in NUS, where would I be now...

Cant Wait To Go Back
Just a little more time! [*] 11:39 AM